The next groomsmaid

By Marjorie

One of my best guy friends is getting married in July and he just recently asked me to be in his wedding. Of course, I said “yes” and am delighted to be on the other side of the fence this time.

However, for my friend, getting me in the wedding wasn’t necessarily an easy task, especially because his bride-to-be insisted that I stand on his side if I was going to be a part of the wedding party.

This dialogue regarding a woman standing on the groom’s side started a fury of questions, and I was in the middle, unsure of how to react. I had never heard of a woman standing on the groom’s side, but if that is what she wanted, then that is what I would do. After all, this is the 21st century and weddings aren’t nearly as traditional as they used to be. For instance, I had my father and my stepfather walk me down the aisle, one on each arm.

And after more thought, I decided that standing next to my friend, whom I’ve known for nearly 10 years, would be a nice change of pace. He and I have the same group of friends – mostly guys – and this way, I would get to stand with them, instead of with a group of women I’m unfamiliar with. Does this mean I get to go to the bachelor party too?

I was getting excited. Even though I felt a little put-off by his future bride, I didn’t mind. After all, I am his friend; she did make that pretty clear.

But after a couple of weeks of not hearing from my friend, I was beginning to wonder if there was a change in plans. And as it turned out, my built-up hopes of standing on the groom’s side were short-lived.

My friend’s fiancée, whom I had never talked to on the phone before and still felt ostracized from “her side,” called and told me that instead of standing on the groom’s side, I would stand with all of the other bridesmaids on the bride’s side.

I didn’t ask questions. I just agreed.

And so the conversation continued with dress-fitting deadlines, wedding shower dates and shoe suggestions, and the decision was final: I was standing on her side.

I’m not quite sure what changed her mind or his – if he had anything to do with it – but I will admit, I was kind of looking forward to standing on the groom’s side.

Either way, I’m happy to be a part of their big day. However, I do suggest that if you’re heart is telling you to switch things up and have groomsmaids or bridesmen, just go for it.